28.11.08

"Writing Back" to the Bro Code

Life as I know it is presently back to normal. As I have become obsessed with How I Met Your Mother, and have clearly spent too much time in English class lately, I have decided to "write back" to Barney's Bro Code as it would pertain to girls.

Article 1: Bros before hoes
Article 1: Chicks before dicks

Article 89: The mom of a bro is always off limits but the step mom of a bro is fair game if she initiates it and/or is wearing at least one article of leopard print clothing.
Article 89: I don't really know what the average response is for this, but I would say dads and step dads are ALWAYS off limits.

Article 34: Bro's cannot make eye contact during a devil's three way (two dudes)
Article 34: ... I have no idea how to respond to this one

Unknown Article: No sex with your bro's ex
Unknown Article: No sex with your friend's ex. This should be a rule for all friends, regardless of gender.

Article 29: a bro will in a timely matter alert his bro to the existence of a girl fight
Article 29: A girl should try and keep her friend out of a girl fight, but if one erupts have her back and try and break it up.

Article 87: a bro shall at all times say yes
Article 87: For this one, a girl should be honest unless in most cases. When acting as a wing man, a girl should follow this rule. When asking about appearance then a girl should be honest, unless the truth will greatly upset a friend (i.e. don't tell a girl you don't like her hair if there's nothing that can be done to fix it.)

Article 53: a bro will whenever possible provide his bro with protection
Article 53: a girl will whenever possible provider her girl with protection. This can be in many forms, either in the form of condoms or in the forms of cock-blocking if a friend is too trashed to make a good decision or would possibly be putting herself in danger.

1 comment:

E said...

hahahaha that was great.